Posted by: Rick Noll on October 26th, 2005
(Puff Daddy – Come With Me)
And now for something completely different (MPFC).
(Disclaimer – The following is not an official review, just my own observations concerning a clandestine viewing of a top secret video of a Bigfoot. The context surrounding its original acquisition and just what it is supposed to portray, since there is no sound accompanying it, are sadly lacking and the Bigfoot research group that helped acquire it remains mum on the subject… but of course there are rumors.)
The night air is cool, a slight dampness from a change in the weather. The porch I am crouched on, behind a railing, provides adequate enough perch to steady the small binoculars I’m looking through. There is no moon. In my line of view, through a living room window I watch as a small TV set plays a supposed Bigfoot video. One that isn’t public. I am excited, hoping to see something as good as the Patterson/Gimlin film.
The people inside are not aware that I can see everything they can. They have left the curtains wide open and must have just cleaned the window. I am keeping an accurate record of my impressions with a small tape recorder. Here would be the elusive Kentucky video.
Ok, it didn’t really happen exactly that way but I thought I would try my hand at some fiction writing. Not very good am I?!
Please don’t label me a peeping Tom. I’m not… I was just having fun. Cloak and dagger stuff you know.
(Donovan – Hurdy Gurdy Man)
The scene opens in broad daylight. The video is very poor in quality, at least the copy I am seeing. There is a medium sized tree on the right hand side of the image; thick, leafless, upright branches reaching to the top of the screen. What might be a slim and attractive, longhaired blonde woman is in partial view within the foreground. She seems to be saying something but there is no sound. A small hillock in back has someone I suspiciously recognize, walking back and forth along it, then dropping down in back of it, out of sight. The hill is maybe 30 feet long and 6 feet high… it is hard to scale but that is what it looks like to me. I suspect he is getting some type of equipment or cabling sorted out. He looks to be very intense about it, as if there might be a problem with something.
They disappear, the scene spasmodically darkens. The camera is jostled. MOTION DETECTED is flashed at the top of the screen, announcing something is about to be seen. It appears as if in B&W infrared light, a light on the right side of that hillock top… everything else is black.
Then what looks like the same woman featured earlier, suddenly appears, walking quite erect from the left, kind of strangely and then kneels down. The only indication that it is a woman is the slim shape and long, glowing, straight white hair. She places something down I didn’t see her carrying before. There are abrupt cuts in this video, probably to speed things along, but it could also be the system timing out. The woman’s movements indicate that she cannot really see the ground she walks on. How can she tell when to stop? She looks to be using her feet to feel her way along the top of the hill. It MUST be infrared light illuminating the area. The tree is not visible and the scene actually looks enlarged from the daylight one, as if the lens was zoomed in or the camera placed closer and at a slightly different angle.
The woman “duck walks” back the way she came, off the hill and all is dark except for that same blown-out hilltop. Can’t quite make out what she left there. MOTION DETECTED again. Then to the right, where that tree seen in daylight is expected to be, a very bright and contrasty, large headed apparition appears. It moves what I take are it’s arms, reaching out to grab at what the woman has left there. It looks to be using hands that have good articulation, hints of ungloved fingers and thumb.
There is a small clock at the top of the screen indicating how much time has passed or how much video has been captured, I am unsure which. It looks as if there are straight lined markings on the arms, at the wrists, such as would be with clothing. Definitely something starts and stops there, whether it be hair and skin or skin and sleeve.
It turns away from the camera, delineating the back of the upper torso with arms to the sides and faces the hilltop. Slight shadows ripple on the subject, looking for all its worth like clothing folds moving along the white object just before it kneels down. It looks more massive than the slim figure previously seen, but not by that much.
At a few points it turns it’s head and the hint of what makes up the face dissolves before enough light has reached the CCD’s of the video camera. Slight movement of this apparition keeps me hopeful, then it fades into the dark again, stage left, maybe crouched, maybe on all fours. The video ends. Unknown if there is more to the original.
What the heck was that? Someone trying to capture bees at night? Because that is exactly what it looks like – a human in a bee harvesting suit and hat… I wonder if that lady put something sweet out?
I am very disappointed. I had hoped that this video would be more than it is… but to be fair, maybe it’s just this copy that is poor. I wish I could put some images of it in this posting but it is unclear as to who owns the piece and I wouldn’t’ want them to get angry about it.