Sasquatch Coffee

Name The Mystery Cryptid

Posted by: Loren Coleman on December 15th, 2008

Reporter Mark LaFlamme has written:

Name that beast

Went to a lecture by famed Cryptozoologist Loren Coleman this weekend and it was quite good. The man knows his stuff and he engages an audience well. He went through the history of his field and then introduced some of the cryptids. You know. The Montauk Monster. The Dover Demon. The Maine Mutant. Other beasties with great alliterative monikers.

If I’d had had more time to plan, I would have brought along the following photo, manufactured by the exceedingly twisted photographer Russ Dillingham, and demanded of the crypto dude: “What do you make of this, Mr. Coleman! If you reach into that bag of pithy nicknames you carry around everywhere, what will you pluck away to describe this horror! What, Mr. Coleman? What?”

Okay, for a little intellectual fun, I’ll throw this open to everyone here. The mystery monster has a memorable moniker, and is known to be linked to ancient festivals. Can you name the beast?

About Loren Coleman
Loren Coleman is one of the world’s leading cryptozoologists, some say “the” leading. Certainly, he is acknowledged as the current living American researcher and writer who has most popularized cryptozoology in the late 20th and early 21st centuries. Starting his fieldwork and investigations in 1960, after traveling and trekking extensively in pursuit of cryptozoological mysteries, Coleman began writing to share his experiences in 1969. An honorary member of Ivan T. Sanderson’s Society for the Investigation of the Unexplained in the 1970s, Coleman has been bestowed with similar honorary memberships of the North Idaho College Cryptozoology Club in 1983, and in subsequent years, that of the British Columbia Scientific Cryptozoology Club, CryptoSafari International, and other international organizations. He was also a Life Member and Benefactor of the International Society of Cryptozoology (now-defunct). Loren Coleman’s daily blog, as a member of the Cryptomundo Team, served as an ongoing avenue of communication for the ever-growing body of cryptozoo news from 2005 through 2013.

20 Responses to “Name The Mystery Cryptid”

  1. fallofrain responds:

    Just a guess….Pan.

  2. darkshines responds:

    Names that come to mind are Pan, Wodin, the Satyr…… All VERY different things though….

  3. fossilhunter responds:

    Greetings All!
    Well… my first impulse is to name him “Patrick”. But if you want a more “crypto” name, how about “The Scandium Scarus”? That’s Latin for “Scandinavian Fright (or scare)”. The picture just looks sort of Scandinavian to me. Or maybe: “Patrick, The Scandium Scarus”!! Yeah, that’s the ticket! Actually it looks like a casting reject from “The Chronicles of Narnia”. And that codpiece looks Photoshoped to me! Loren, maybe you should start being a little more particular about the after-parties you attend after speaking engagements!

  4. Scarfe responds:

    The Krampus or any of those other pre-Christian alpine wildmen / demons

  5. corrick responds:

    Conan O’Brien?

  6. NHbigfoot responds:

    Like people said before Pan but more recently the Maryland Goatman?

  7. ukulelemike responds:

    Hmmm, who could it be? Could it be…oh, I don’t know…maybe, uhhhhh

  8. DavidFredSneakers responds:


    Or a Perchten?

    Merry Christmas!!

  9. Loren Coleman responds:

    Yes, indeed, it appears to be a Krampus with reporter Mark’s photoshopped head placed on the body.

    So, perhaps it should be called LaFlamme’s Krafty Krampus?

  10. Goodfoot responds:

    Wait! That’s a CAT? Call ‘im FUNKY!

  11. MattBille responds:

    “We call this Homo luskius, the unfortunate result of a transporter accident when Captain Picard and a Luskite from Celestes IX beamed down together…”

  12. crapple responds:

    Its not a satyr, fawn, or Pan- all are half goat, only furry from the waist down, and they have goat horns.

  13. Richard888 responds:

    Since the horns look bovine I would have to say the Minotaur of Crete.

  14. Bob Malarkey responds:

    first impression is satyr, but as crapple said, they are only furry from the waist down. minotaur as some above said is my guess

  15. MT responds:

    Cerrunos, God of luck and earth.. gets married at beltaine..

  16. Daniel-san responds:

    It is the Krampus.

    The Anti-Claus.
    The one of the switches and coal.

    Doling out both gifts and punishment is just too much to ask of one mythical being.

  17. Galea responds:

    frankly it just looks like a minotaur to me

  18. cryptidsrus responds:

    Is it just me or does it look SORT of like Bill O’Reilly (terribly aged) dressed as a satyr/faun/krampus???
    Just saying. Good thread, though, Loren.

  19. ukulelemike responds:

    So, really, he’s another version of Black Peter? Ah-indeed, the devil, as that is who doles out punishments, (as well as presents) as he accompanies St. Nicolas, or Sinterklaas, in the Netherlands. Sometimes, if a child was particularly bad, he would drag them to hell! Oh, yeah, THAT’S the way to remember the birth of the Saviour!

  20. Daniel-san responds:

    I think one of these is going in my yard every Christmas from now on.

    Also, as a sculptor, I would love about 500 lbs of coal for my forge. Maybe I sent my list to the wrong address. I even went on about how horrible I had been to puppies.

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