When Fringe Meets Fact
Posted by: Craig Woolheater on December 19th, 2013
From Sasquatch Ontario:
A continuous progression, an unveiling of truth.
Sasquatch are NOT what the mainstream portrays.
A people that have an ability to manifest a physical body at will and walk completely invisible while still having ability to vocalize and leave foot prints by choice.
These are the facts learned through many months of first hand consistent experience.
Our closest and longest intimate vocal exchange to date.
Foot prints found only on the cottage pathway and around the vehicle, sign from a forest giant who walks in another dimension. Hair samples collected.
More enigmatic photos taken by the sasquatch themselves.Sasquatch Ontario
Co-founder of Cryptomundo in 2005.
I have appeared in or contributed to the following TV programs, documentaries and films:
OLN's Mysterious Encounters: "Caddo Critter", Southern Fried Bigfoot, Travel Channel's Weird Travels: "Bigfoot", History Channel's MonsterQuest: "Swamp Stalker", The Wild Man of the Navidad, Destination America's Monsters and Mysteries in America: Texas Terror - Lake Worth Monster, Animal Planet's Finding Bigfoot: Return to Boggy Creek and Beast of the Bayou.
More of the same (sigh)… Until/unless the alleged hair sample comes back with “unknown primate” DNA or they produce several minutes of CLEAR, unambiguous video, no sense in wasting any more time on these guys.
Ho Ho Ho, who’s gonna know? Ho Ho Ho, who’s gonna know-oh. Out on the front porch switch switch swatch. Who can it be but Old St. Squatch. All this amazing evidence and yet, not one – one mind you – half clear, recognizable image of any kind. All we really need here is the Looney Tunes intro. “The Merry-go-round Broke Down”…”Eebba debba debba, that’s all folks.”
Just when I think those guys can’t go any further off the edge…
What next? Sasquatch as tulpas/thought manifestations?
This is either comic genius or something else.
Actually, this IS sasquatch as the mainstream portrays it…which is why the mainstream doesn’t take sasquatch seriously.
(I needed to add that I just vocalized – HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! – and left footprints. By choice. Note that I am still invisible to you.)
cryptokellie:
100 bonus points for knowing the name of the LOONEY TUNES theme song! Very good.
Meanwhile, our Ontario Heroes are talking to Bigfoot as if he were a child… actually, if these vocalizations are fake, they’re really good. At the very least, highly entertaining. I’d like to meet the person who could do fake vocalizations this well. They sound very much like what I heard. And it wasn’t in Ontario. It was in New Mexico.
They sound like someone with an enormous chest cavity. Can’t be Captain Beefheart; he’s dead.
Magical Sasquatch… geez. I’ve delt with these kind of thinkers before. It’s not pretty. The guy on the video sounds like he’s ready to roast marshmallows and sing Kumbaya with it.
It’s kind of hard for me to take this seriously when the Sasquatch sounds like Sloth from “The Goonies”. Seriously, couldn’t someone analyze the audio and determine pretty quickly if the audio was manipulated or if it came from someone/something as you hear it as well as determine if the vocal range is human or of any other known animal? I don’t know why so much time is wasted debating the authenticity of these pieces of evidence when the technology exists to analyze it. Are there any reports about the results of the hair sample analysis? This guy seems a little wacky, this is the reason mainstream
I sure would have liked to see a side by side snow compression comparison. Easy enough to do.
Eta: I think the vocalization thing might be over played.
I was on a woods walk with my daughter and, after seeing Finding Bigfoot, she started doing some calls. What I’m saying is, a six year old knows about this. My new criteria is “a noise that humans can’t make”
Apparently Sasquatch can also hurdle sharks. I’ve been deliberately non-judgmental on this, but I think I’ll just very quietly sneak out the door and not let the latch click when it closes…..bye.
I really like the part about leaving footprints if they choose to…. like we don’t have enough trouble with skeptics….
Wow, I didn’t realize my earlier comment got posted. I was having trouble with it and assumed it didn’t work. I think it was probably clear where I was going with this, I just don’t like to leave something half done. Either way, is it just me or does this guy seem a little odd? I wonder what he considers “mainstream”.
My whole problem with this supernatural quality to Bigfoot is that I do not believe it’s necessary. I’ve been arguing this long and loud as of late, but for me, Bigfoot doesn’t need supernatural abilities in order to evade humanity on a regular basis. Investigations for Bigfoot have not been precise, involved or conducted in a way that would shed some evidence from what I’ve seen going on. A few people out in the woods walking trails or worse, sitting with their thermal cameras isn’t going to cut it. That’s trying to get lucky.
Ok, for the sake of argument, let’s take a look at it. I have read, heard and had it suggested that Bigfoot is a creature that can shift in and out of our world, a dimensional being, if you will. That would go a long way to solving the age old question of why there aren’t more sightings. Or would it.
If you buy into string theory, parallel worlds or a host of other theories out there, it is conceivably possible that this world we live in is one layered upon many and, at least in theory, it would be possible to step from one to another.
I have seen theories where this is exactly what people argue, and that Bigfoot may be one of these beings that either can inherently dance between worlds or has learned to do it…accounting for only leaving footprints when they feel like it, or being seen, and so on.
However, if I were a Bigfoot and I could do such things, why would I allow myself to be seen at all? One of the most prominent locations for Bigfoot sightings is on roads. People driving from A to B make their trips and lo and behold they see a Bigfoot crossing the road. If you had the ability to shift dimensions or planes, why would you become solid enough to be seen by a roadway of all places? Any Bigfoot intelligent enough to jump dimensions should have enough cognizance to know that roadways are traveled by other beings and present a better chance of being spotted.
There have been cases I’ve read of hunters in blinds who have surprised a BF and seen it, which one could argue that Bigfoots get taken unawares from time to time. I’ll concede that. On the other hand, reports such as that, it also never takes the sighted Bigfoot long to zero in on the witness’s location. It suggests a high level of perception and intelligence.
That being the case, if a Bigfoot has a reasonable intelligence, even instinctual, then that makes the idea of a dimension hopping Bigfoot even more implausible. Even if it visits for food, it has to be aware of its surroundings enough to be able to come and go, and if you could do such things, would you make mistakes so often that you and your kind are literally seen over and over again? No.
For that matter, most sightings, the Bigfoot is moving and walking and going to some destination. If they had the ability to slip into our world and out, why are they always on the move? IF they needed to retreat after being seen, why not just disappear?
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: I think humanity over estimates its ability as king of the animal kingdom. There are plenty of things more clever than us. Doubt me? Watch a few episodes of your favorite crypto-reality show. Or just read a newspaper once in a while and you’ll see just how intelligent our race is.
We’re looking at an elusive physical creature with real intelligence that knows its home well enough to evade the multitudes of humanity a lot of the time.
It’s just ridiculous. Seriously.
Yes this ridiculous..and pretty funny.
But get off your high horses..they aint that high..
You mostly run with every hoax going anyway..you have to keep the dream alive..
So..the “rational” belief(meme) around here..is..there is a monsterous bipedal creature that cannot die/cannot be shot or captured..over several centuries..oh and thats right..over several continents..
Have you guys no self awareness at all..???? 🙂
Have you guys no self awareness at all..????
We wonder the same thing about somebody who keeps coming on a crypto website to go “nuh uh….nuh uh….nuh uh…nuh uh….nuh uh….nuh uh…nuh uh….nuh uh….nuh uh…
nuh uh….nuh uh….nuh uh…nuh uh….nuh uh….nuh uh…” while blatantly refusing to get abreast of the subject matter.
You know that almost all of us think this lot here is silly, right?
(You don’t. Point made.)